Don't You Hate When Satirists Make Sweeping Statements About a Group of People?

            Alright you’ve reeled me in with a good title, now where is this going? Honestly… I haven’t decided yet. Let’s just riff for a bit. Satire… that was a word I used in the title. Let’s talk about that. Satire is an interesting form of art in that the creator can get away with doing or saying just about anything, as it is not representative of how they really feel, they are just making a statement about society, and if you can’t appreciate that, then it is “your” problem. Some people feel that these “art” works take the joke too far and are simply offensive. This is probably true in some cases. However, the caveat is that I don’t care. Here is the beautiful thing about art, in most instances it is completely up to you whether you wish to consume it. The exception, of course, being the awful soundtrack playing on repeat at your place of employment. You are forced to listen to that repetitive, soulless droning day in and day out whether you like it or not.

So, speaking from my libertarian side, I say let the satirist make whatever they want, and if you don’t like it, don’t watch it, listen to it, read it, what have you. But what about my previous example? What about the art that you are force fed? Should that work be censored? Could we really allow a risqué painting to be posted on the city corner for all to see? Think about the children! The answer is, of course… complicated. I am not going to say we should allow anything and everything to be posted in public spaces, that would just be grotesque.

Unfortunately, I feel that we have completely messed up on what material should be censored. For instance, abortion protestors are waving around graphic signs and shouting obscenities under the protection of the law, while recording artists cannot use the word fuck without having to release a whole second version of their album. See the edited version of this article where I say f*ck if that last sentence offended you. Movies and music are restricted based on lude content. But this is an instance where I, as a consumer, can make the choice not to listen to the music or see a film I find offensive. The music on the radio; I can change the station. The music in convenience stores; I can abstain from shopping there and let the free market handle its own.

And the timeless argument is… think of the children. Certainly we can’t let children listen to music with vulgar lyrics. Parents should be able to control what their children consume, right? Right!? I will let you in on two little secrets. One, children are people, not property. Two, if they want to listen to a song with vulgar lyrics, they will find a way to listen to it. If you truly believe certain music to be too abhorrent for listening, instill that in them and hope that they agree. If they don’t, children are people. They will have their own opinions and make their own choices and the best you can do is to make sure they have all of the information necessary to make an informed choice. What’s the best way to make sure someone has all of the information? I’ll give you a hint, it is not carding a sixteen year old who wants to see the latest shoot ‘em up film, (not to be confused with the 2007 film “Shoot ‘Em Up,” although being rated R that would also work in this example).

So there you go. We talked about satire, censorship, and respecting your children. And you probably thought this was going to be about prejudice or something. Don’t you hate when hypocritical satirists write misleading titles?

-AMS

What Should be the Alpha Level of the Criminal Justice System?

            Scenario: You are the child of a dictator who just passed away. In his passing, you have inherited full reign over a small nation. You have complete control over the state. Your father was a notoriously corrupt man who often abused his supreme power with no regard toward justice. You, being of a more moral mindset, have decided to use your reign to correct the injustices of your predecessor. Upon hearing this, one of your informants takes the initiative to enlighten you on the current state of the prison system. It seems that your father paid no mind to locking up “criminals” without trial or even evidence. For the right price, he would lock up the high school valedictorian who stole the rank away from your much more deserving salutatorian child. You are, of course, appalled to hear of this and demand forthright that the informant gather a report of every prison within the country’s borders.

            Some weeks later the report is finished and delivered to your desk. You peruse the results of the first prison. Without the need for a fair trial, proper procedures were rarely followed and it would be impossible to determine the innocence of any individual prisoner. However, based on jurisdiction information, an estimate of this particular prison as a whole was able to be generated and suggests an approximate population of 90% innocents to 10% criminals. Feeling for the lives that were torn away from these citizens, you decree to release all of the prisoners being held. You justify the release of the guilty by the overwhelming number of innocents who were wrongly convicted.

            You feel a brief dawning of hope for the new nation that you are building knowing how many citizens will be able to begin rebuilding their lives. You turn to the next section of the report and examine the results of another prison. Again, the evidence and reports needed to determine individual outcomes is absent but an estimate of the prison as a whole is given. This prison was split 50-50 of criminals and falsely convicted, law abiding citizens.

            What is your decree? Do you set them all free as before, or is freeing half a prison’s population of felons too great a cost? Regardless of your answer, imagine that as you continue through the various prisons in the report you are met with the same question every time, but of different proportions of guilty and innocents. What percentage of a prison would have to be innocent to justify letting the inverse of criminals free on the world.

            Statistically, we are discussing a number known as alpha. It is the probability a person is willing to make in a data analysis of making a type I error, that is, a false positive. In simpler terms, what percent of the time are you willing to falsely convict an innocent person in your criminal justice system. Of course, in research this number can be set, whereas in practice we can only estimate what has been established by the current laws and practices. However, I still find it an interesting thought experiment. So ask all of your friends, what prison would be your threshold? At what point would either alternative be equally appropriate within your own beliefs?

            -AMS

My New Year's Resolution is NOT to Get More Sleep

            It is that time of year again. The gyms are full, the nicotine patches are flying off of the shelves, and people are insisting that this time they “really” mean it. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for people continually attempting to better themselves. The issue is not with the idea, it is the lack of commitment. People quickly fall back into their old routines and content themselves with their lifestyles, but if one person actually does manage to quit smoking or change their diet, then it was all worth it in the end. Personally, I have little I wish to resolve this year. As you can tell by the title, my resolution is more of a maintenance. So why do I not want more sleep?

            Scientists and medical professionals would recommend an average of seven to nine hours of sleep a day. That’s a lot of sleep. Roughly a third of your life. Who has that kind of time, and more importantly who would want to spend so much of their time accomplishing nothing? With so many things to do in this life, so many things to see, places to go, skills to learn, activities to partake in, I surely don’t want to waste any of that time lying down for hours at a time, night after night. Some people love sleep and spend their evenings looking forward to collapsing into a warm billow of cotton, letting their thoughts flow uninterrupted, and preparing themselves for the monotonous grind of tomorrow; a word which is here being used metaphorically to represent every tomorrow for the rest of one’s life. That is precisely my problem with sleep.

            For the majority of people every day is the same. You wake, you eat, you work, you play, you sleep, you repeat. That becomes daunting with an alarming swiftness. How does one fend off burnout in such conditions? Well, if we knew that, people would probably be better at sticking to their resolutions. I find sanctity in the sanctuous parts of my life; a word which here has nothing to do with purity, but simply means the parts of my life that I find stimulating. People say that working hard is being productive. I disagree. I have always found work to be a means to support one’s real life. No one will pay me to do the things I want to do, so I compromise and give some of my time to society in exchange for the funds to do those things I find productive. That is not to say that I dislike my work. Regardless of the job I would certainly not maintain a full-time career were I to be otherwise perpetually supported financially.

            Remember, sleep is a third of your life. It turns out in the United States, work is about another 23%. There’s half your life gone. Once you consider the amount of time people spend commuting, cleaning, and doing errands, what do you have left? I have had days that slipped right out from under me. By the time I had finished all of those necessary “living” things, it was time to go to sleep, after all, I needed at least seven hours of it.

            Thus, my resolution. Do I usually get enough sleep? Not even close. Am I okay with that? Definitely. If a few exhausted mornings mean that I can keep a day from being wasted on the “productive,” then so be it. Perhaps I can make up that sleep on a slower day after I accomplish all of my sanctuous activities.

            -AMS